Preparing for Home

Well, I suppose I never realized how truly out of touch with time I have been until it dawned on me a couple of days ago that Easter is not next weekend. I am completely screwed up with time, it seems, and have been seriously operating under the assumption that Easter was sooner than its actual date on the calendar. And no one was kind enough to correct me either. Oops. So with Easter two weeks away, we will likely spend the next two weeks continuing to help our dad recover and regain strength, in preparation for chemotherapy that will presumably begin shortly after our Easter holiday.

This week has been a good one for our dad. He decided to spend the week with Gina, to continue his course with the visiting nurse and physical therapist, and to be surrounded by people and activity throughout each day. It is clear to us he feels safer when surrounded by others throughout the day. The days continued to be positive times for our dad. He seemed to enjoy his time with Gina and her little ones. His kinship and connection with Gianna seemed to grow and be a mutually adorable experience. Evenings still remained a struggle. Our dad experienced pain most intensely and palpably at night. Since last Tuesday, his evening "bedtime" routine began with one Advil PM and a prescribed pain med to help get him to sleep; though he still had trouble sleeping for an extended period and would inevitably wake in the middle of the night for the additional Advil PM to help carry him through the evening hours. His body now appears regulated to a 3 hour sleep cycle. He remains troubled to find a comfortable position in which to sleep and is restless. Gina wonders if our dad is generally restless, as she hears him moaning or making plaintive comments in Italian during the night. She wonders this especially because when she checks on him--worried for his restlessness--he is actually sleeping.

By Thursday, our dad had begun to spend daytime hours without dependence on his walker, a major step in the right direction. He is showering every day and seems to have a witty sense of humor, Gina reports. She says he is "hamming it up" with the visiting nurse and physical therapist and is cracking jokes, making hilarious and sarcastic one-liners with Gina as they hang out together. Carmelo visits on Thursday with his son Vincent to watch NCAA basketball. They spend the entire day and into the late hours of the evening together. Our dad was delighted. An added surprise guest on Thursday for March Madness visiting was our dad's nephew, Matt Regan. The guys all hung out together and watched the games and seemed to enjoy a laid-back, relaxing time. Our dad was truly touched by Matt's visit and was so happy to see Carmelo again as well as his grandson, Vinnie.

Our mom and Tony arrived for the weekend on Saturday morning. Our dad, of course, was happy to be with them again too. Saturday seemed busy and bustling at Gina's house. Our dad seemed to be in pretty good spirits on Saturday. He looked great. We had a low-key day, played 'reindeer games' with the kids while our dad watched basketball, and enjoyed a fantastic family dinner, compliments of Mr. and Mrs. Aiello. It was a good day with good energy shared by everyone there.

Today our dad prepared for the journey home--back to Milwaukee. He has his followup appointment with Dr. Krishnan tomorrow afternoon and his oncology appointment with Dr. Treisman immediately after Dr. Krishnan. Our dad seemed nervous about going home...not for anything except the change, it seemed. My guess, too, is the impending appointments tomorrow have him unsettled as well, especially the oncologist. Gina told our dad that he is welcome to return to her house for the week if he would like and assured him that he should do whatever makes him feel most comfortable. It is apparent, to all of us, that he does quite well and is good for his spirits when he has people around him throughout the day. Both he and our mom seem to be concerned about imposing too much on any of us, though. They are assured there is no imposition.

He is now home safely. Our mom seems glad for it and is, no doubt, looking forward to their physical closeness...saying goodnight at bedtime and greeting him with a kiss in the morning. She seems to miss not taking care of him herself. It is obvious they have missed each other. While there is some natural trepidation from both of them for this homecoming, we all hope his first night back home is restful and comfortable. Equally important, we hope he feels secure and proud of how he has evolved and strengthened these two weeks post-surgery, especially as he anticipates his big appointments tomorrow. His belief in himself is both essential and critical, and seems (true to him) the most difficult hurdle to overcome.